Shadow Work- Part 2

LET’S START WORK!

A) KNOW YOURSELF

https://youtu.be/vGsrQ_Dx5Mc

1. Observe your triggers: Triggers will appear in your relationships.
2. Triggers will put you in front of the mirror: The things we hate the most in other people are actually inside us, at least in a symbolic way. To put it in another way, what we dislike in others is also what we dislike about ourselves.
Mirror theory can act in a direct or inverse way. Let’s take an example. Say you can’t stand how selfish your friend is. In a direct way, you may be projecting the selfish part of you that you refuse to see. On the other hand, in an inverse way, they might be reflecting how selfless you are. Maybe you’re always caring for others and forgetting yourself. Either way it is valuable information if you want to get to know yourself and grow.
https://exploringyourmind.com/mirror-theory-wounds-relationships/
Same happens with the things you LOVE most in other people. That parts you admire, are in you, but you suppressed them.
3. Mirror will give you a hint: Maybe you feel not being loved and you are triggered when you see something that points to a lack of love towards you in someone close to you. What you feel is what you fear. You are afraid of not being loved.
4. Realize how that fear (not being loved) interferes with your life. Maybe you are deliberately choosing people that mistreat you and are not loving at you as you wish, or keeping you stuck in toxic relationships, lowering your self-esteem, etc.
5. Meditate about that feeling:
        a. Why this part of your shadow exists?
        b. When you use to have that same feeling? In which situations?
        c. When was the first time you experienced that feeling? Allow your unconscious to give you the answer, the memory, maybe it will come in your dreams, maybe during meditation, maybe something came up in your mind suddenly.
6. Observe your memory: Maybe you were not properly nurtured as a child, maybe your mother had postpartum depression and rejected you many times when you tried to hug her, reacting with anger towards you.
7. Understand what happened in your mind at that time:
A child’s mind does not work as a grown up’s mind. Those situations, in a child’s mind make the child thinks her mother will be anger if he/she continues asking for love, so mom will not provide. If mom will not provide, the child will die.
Yes, that is how our mind works when we are a child, we are absolutely dependable on our parents, our mind is set up for survival. We survive if mom and dad provide. Maybe they do not love us, but if we have food, we can survive.

The logical consequence for a child is thinking: "If I do ask for love, I will die."

So, to survive, we reject the clingy-needy part of us.
There is a split in our consciousness, in our ego:
So now, I am me, and my clingy-needy part of me is not me anymore. At least that is what we thought.
That part never disappears, it is hidden from us in our subconscious mind, our shadow, and it will take control over us when a trigger occurs, without us realizing about why we are behaving like that.

We have fragmented our ego.
That fragmentation happens on each one of us, human beings.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EeUlPO2iXb4

8. Analyze how those facts affect your conception of yourself: And why the child cannot ask for love? Because he is not worthy of it, he does not deserve it. That is how a child’s mind works.

So, you develop this intense BELIEVE (paradigm) of not being worthy of love.
The natural behave, if you do not deserve being loved, is nothing but surrounding yourself by people that do not love you, or being in a toxic relationship, or…)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tGQudacvgsA


Now, you have the point, you know where the root cause is. You know why you are triggered by certain situations. ANd you know when it did start.
But, how to heal that for good?
You must “reprogram” yourself on actually being worthy of love
How?

Reference- Ana Barrios, https://myownpathwalker.blogspot.com

Shadow Work- Part 1

WHAT SHADOW WORK IS AND HOW CAN IT HELP YOU
Shadow work is the integration of your subconscious mind (Carl Jung) into your conscious mind. To accept your personality traits that you have disowned during your childhood in order to being loved.

You rejected a part of yourself that was not allowed, or was perceived as "wrong". You can perceive it as a behavior "not screaming out loud", "not get your clothes dirty". But to get along again with your mom, to not repeat that behavior again, you had to banish a full part of your personality.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2s8I3yq-Kmo
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qHPI6LucOo0&t=89s


WHY SHADOW WORK? You just have to be positive!!
Many people think shadow work will only focus you in the “bad” parts of your life and that will call more “bad” things to your life. That is a wrong misconception of the Law of Attraction:

If you have a physical wound, being positive about it won’t heal it.
This is the same, you have to heal yourself first.

Positive focus works on everything, except for the things that you are trying to use positive focus to avoid.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YUfEA4yVMMk

RECOGNIZE YOURSELF: How Your Childhood Affects Your Adult Relationships
Some examples that can help you recognizing your triggers and the origin of them.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3ZdRpEKYE9M
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vk-pRQSxGSs

Reference- Ana Barrios, https://myownpathwalker.blogspot.com

A New Chapter

sweetheart, i want to remind you of who you are. you are fearless in the face of monsters. you always stand up for what you believe in, even when you know you will be ridiculed for it. you speak your mind because your convictions are the core of who you are. they define your soul, and this terrifies those who have no real power. your sight is sharp; it pierces through the lies others try to serve you. you see through their deception because your intuition is strong, your power of discernment remarkable. you know truth when you hear it, it vibrates through your being. you’ve left behind your self-doubt, insecurities, and all illusions you had about yourself. you're finally ready to embrace the woman you truly are and always have been. when you started believing in yourself, something in you shifted. you're now on a path to happiness and peace. no more wars, darling. no more monsters to fight at night. a new chapter has begun!

Introduction To Shadow Work

“Shadow work is the path of the Heart Warrior” – Carl Jung

   You know when something triggers some dark part of you, and you over-react, so no one understands you, or everyone says you are being dramatic? When you cannot stand yourself and you only want to go sleep.

   That is what happens when your shadows take the lead:

Shadows are the parts of your personality that you rejected during your life (mostly your childhood) and banished to your subconscious. Those parts emerge out of control when something triggers them and take the lead of your behavior.
   Like when you are an adult, constantly seeking for love, having toxic relationships, or wining to someone because you need him/her to be more affectionate or love-expressing.
That comes, most probably, from a childhood where your parents didn't give you the love you needed (or not enough love as you demanded).
   Those shadows, those traits of your personality that you banned from you, are the hidden parts of you that don't allow you to be happy. To be complete. To feel you are not alone.      Why? Because you are rejecting a part of you, you are not loving yourself, but the idea of yourself.
   So, before going super mystic it is a necessity doing your own shadow work.
   It will be tough, cannot fool you. You must look at your true self at the mirror without any filters. You must acknowledge, accept and integrate into you something that you have suppressed into your subconscious mind, because you have rejected it, or disowned it, or denied, mostly, due to being loved, or survive.

Reference- Ana Barrios, https://myownpathwalker.blogspot.com

Your Desire Is Coming

you have the power
to let the thoughts
of him die
you have the right
to move on
you don't need
anyone's permission
you've proven to yourself
and everyone around you
that you are a woman
capable of making decisions
on your own
and better equipped now
of choosing a better man
to share your life with
soon, you will see
your desire for true love
coming to you
soon, you will forget
the love that robbed you

What I Deserve

i thought your leaving
would be the end of me
that i wouldn't be able
to survive in this world
without you
but i've been nursing my wounds
healing all the broken parts of me
lovingly giving myself time to heal
and transmuting all the hate you gave me
it wasn't easy
in the beginning
in fact it was terrifying
and at times crippling
but i made it through
to the other side of divorce
and i can tell the world
i survived you
i can smile again
and i can be loved
by a man
whom genuinely adores me
and will fight for me
because that is what i deserve

Sapphire and Arion: A New Story

Sapphire had the power in her to create change in her life. She recognized this power in Arion too. Arion clung to his outer life, his possessions and wealth, as a means of taking the focus off of his inner struggles that weighed on his mind and heart. He had grown accustomed to having the void inside of him filled with toys, cars, a big house, and nice things. He purposely deflected his feelings so he could avoid feeling pain. 


Her memory haunted him. Arion watched Sapphire’s life from a distance. Sapphire was moving forward on her path and not looking back. She was shifting her perspective and seeing her ties to Arion in a new light. It was no accident their paths had crossed 20 years ago. They each had lessons to learn and karma to undo. Sapphire’s separation from Thaddeus was painful. But the wounds that Arion left on her heart were deeper and more permanent. Arion’s thoughtless actions of not making any attempt to reach out to her, made Sapphire feel unwanted, unloved.


Halfway across the world, the doors of fate had swung wide open on Arion. He was now being dealt his karma, which caused him to examine his actions and reflect on the pain he caused Sapphire. He felt remorse for his immature actions and his unwillingness to confront Sapphire. Deep down, he wanted to change; he wanted to reach out to her. Arion was fearful of moving forward. He had many doubts about the future. In his mind, it was easier to keep her memory alive than it was to see her again.


His awareness was slowly shifting; new opportunities were presenting themselves to him. A new story was emerging as he cautiously embraced a new direction. Would it include her? Would he move past his fear and merge both of their worlds? Arion was moving towards unconditional love, and at the same time, Sapphire was too.


Their time apart made them both realize how deep their connection was, no matter how much time had passed, and the distance between them, they were always connected. Deep healing was taking place in them both that could only be accomplished through separation. They both now had to figure out who they wanted to be. The dots were connecting, and with fate, there was always the possibility of them coming back together.