Attention in Relationships

There is something that can change your relationship, deeply, simply, powerfully.

It can enhance the intimacy and connection you feel.

It can open doors to a heightened expression of love.

And it can be a way to awareness, in all of life.

Attention.

One word.

Attention.

Attention is presence, attention is awareness.

Attention is the space where intimacy flourishes and flows.

Attention is the space where we feel seen, loved, heard, acknowledged.

Attention brings us into our bodies, into our hearts.

Attention is the opening to possibility in the moment.

Attention is what we give to our lovers, out of the openness of our hearts.

Attention is the desire to love, to express love, to show love in so many ways. 

Attention is us seeing, with an inner vision, seeing with our soul, love.

Over time, attention is an element of intimacy that becomes the substance of a lasting relationship, of fulfilment, of joy, of sharing.

It’s where we see and are seen.

Hear and heard, feel and are felt.

And when I give my attention to you, there is love.

There is an intention with this.

The intention begins with a question, what kind of relationship would you like to have?

How important is your relationship, how important is your lover?

How important is it to be conscious, to be aware, in your relationship?

How can your relationship be a path to presence?

How can your relationship bring you from patterning, from conditioning, from expectation to the freedom of the moment?

How can your relationship be a space of healing?

How can your relationship be a path of growth?

Attention.

Giving your attention to the moment, to your lover, in the moment.

Brings you into attention, into yourself.

Attention is time, not things.

Attention is intimacy in action, expressed in words, gestures, touch, listening, pleasure.

It’s often small things, not exclusively.  

And it is so linked to arousal.

Attention says that I desire you.

And the arousal grows from attention, simply, deeply.

In the space of attention, it’s always there. It might be low at times, a fire that’s quietened to embers, and as you breathe on it, it comes to flame.

Attention.

Simple, so much in it.

A world of intimacy, of awareness.

Of possibility.

Of love.

~Jonti Searll

Soulmates- Don’t Settle For Less

Why settle for less than this:

The love that holds you 

when you feel shattered, broken, 

exhausted. 

The love that embraces you 

while your heart is aching 

and swaddles you with its warm presence

while you are quaking with fear. 

The love that doesn't turn away. 

The love that never shames you. 

Never tries to fix you or tell you 

that you are wrong, or sick, 

or unevolved. 

The love that sees you. 

That validates your experience. 

Bows to your perceptions, desires, 

feelings, needs. 

Sees your anger as holy.

Your sorrow as sacred.

But doesn't try to save you. 

The love that doesn't promise 

what it cannot deliver.

The love that doesn't expect you 

to abandon yourself either.

This is the love you deserve, friend,

because it's the love that you are.

The love that radiates from your very core.

And you long for your own reflection.

Your own radiance, reflected!

To feel alive, yes, to let your soul sing!

And to be witnessed by a mate. 

A friend. A lover. 

For a day. For a week. 

Or for a lifetime.

In presence,

we can all be soul mates 

for each other.

- Jeff Foster 

The Ache of Wanting to be Loved

Her head

Started to float

She felt tired

Worn-out 

So many childish games

Men play

And she was all played out

She just wanted to rest her soul 

Somewhere safe

Somewhere familiar 

With a soul

Who knew the sleepiness

And ache

Of wanting to be loved

 

You Deserve an Extraordinary Lover

You deserve a lover who wants you disheveled, with everything and all the reasons that wake you up in a haste and the demons that won’t let you sleep.

You deserve a lover who makes you feel safe, who can consume this world whole if he walks hand in hand with you; someone who believes that his embraces are a perfect match with your skin.

You deserve a lover who wants to dance with you, who goes to paradise every time he looks into your eyes and never gets tired of studying your expressions.

You deserve a lover who listens when you sing, who supports you when you feel shame and respects your freedom; who flies with you and isn’t afraid to fall.

You deserve a lover who takes away the lies and brings you hope, coffee, and poetry.

~Frida Kahlo

Pain Covers Up Pain

Pain covers up pain

That's what she told herself 

The good pain is welcomed 

The kind that burns your insides

When the one you're thinking about

Is miles away

And you wish you could be near them

You haven't forgotten 

The many nights spent alone

Comforting the pain from men

That treated you badly

Didn't love you and used you

Left you broken

In pain

Until the day 

When you met someone 

That saw your pain

And wanted to take it away

The pain caused by real love

Is the wound

Where the light enters

And no trace of others no longer exist 

You Have It All!

Before dying at age 40, of stomach cancer, the world-renowned designer and author Crisda Rodriguez wrote:

1. I had the world's most expensive car in my garage but now I have to move in a wheelchair.

2. My house sells all kinds of branded clothes, shoes and valuables, but now my body is wrapped in a small cloth provided by the hospital.

3. I have plenty of money in the bank. But now I benefit nothing from this amount.

4. My house was like a castle but now I'm sleeping on two beds in the hospital.

5. From five star hotel to five star hotel. But right now I'm spending time in the hospital moving from lab to lab.

6. I have given hundreds of people signatures but this time medical records are my signature.

7. I've had seven barbers to do my hair, but now - I don't have a hair on my head.

8. Traveled in a private jet, I can fly anywhere, but now I need two aids to walk to the hospital door.

9. Although there are a lot of foods, now my diet is two tablets a day and a few drops of salt water at night.

This house, this car, this plane, this furniture, this bank, too much reputation and fame, none of them serves me. None of this will relax me. "There is nothing real except death."

At the end of the day it's all about health.

Please be happy with the little or how much you have. As long as you have health, a plate of food, a place to sleep, a family and God … YOU HAVE IT ALL!

-Tania Moon

The Red Dress

he watched her

from a distance 

she took him places

no woman ever has

he imagined her

in a tight fitting red dress

as his eyes

followed her movements

from across the distance 

he needed her

to live in his memory 

a place where

he could imagine 

she was an importance to him

he held on to her

hoping one day

he'd be near her

watching her up close

as she walked towards him

and distance narrowing 

sex and love, fantasy and reality 

a fine line