He Loves Me Not

I cursed, screamed, and cried.
I cursed, screamed, and cried some more.

Silence broke and shattered
to a million pieces on the bathroom floor.

He loves me, he loves me not.
My heart broken, tender, sore.

 

My Letter To God: Hide Me!

Lord,

I seek your rest, for my soul is very weary. I seek your strength, for my body is weak. I seek your wisdom, for my mind clouded. I seek your courage to get me through this dark night. I seek your mercy to give me grace.
The storm I am in is drowning me. Please God remove all of my fears and guide me through this turbulent time. Lord I beg you! Hide me in the shadow of your wings!

Always Your Most Humble Devotee

The Mulla

In our dissatisfaction of our life, we are like the seeker who packed his belongings in a knapsack and set off in search of happiness. On the way he met the Mulla and told him of his discontent. Suddenly, the Mulla grabbed the man's knapsack and ran off with it. "Stop!" cried the man as he ran after the Mulla. "Those are my life possessions! Stop!" The Mulla stopped abruptly and handed over the bag. With a sense of relief the man exclaimed, "I feel so happy to have my things back!" The Mulla gave him an amused look and said, "Before you get angry at me, please notice that you feel happy. You had the possessions before I took them from you, but you were not grateful for them. You were not present with the joy of what you possessed until you lost it. May you learn to treasure the blessings of what you have."

Reference~ Spiritual Gems of Islam

Channeling- Seeds of Thought

From Journal Entry 2/14/17

Your thoughts are seeds
that take root and bloom
So be careful which thoughts
you knead and wisely choose

My State, My State

What is of my state presently? Right now I am fair, a gentle creature- calmness is my state.
But reader, be warned! My state may change quickly! What's brewing on the inside may desire to come out suddenly. There may be tears, anger, vile words in the manner in which I speak to you. So you may desire to leave me alone.

Alone I do my deepest, uprooting work. For what spews out of me cleanses me and makes room for yet another version of myself to come forth.
God always improving His creation one violent state at a time.
 

Shattered Glass

She broke her silence. It sounded like a thousand pieces of glass shattering on the ground. The mask of duality gone.

Gnostic Teachings- The Two Lines of Life, Part 3

The Line of Being

It is here we find another line, a line that runs in a totally different direction from the Line of Life. The Line of Being expresses levels of consciousness. In the Line of Being there are many levels. There are "more" conscious beings and "less" conscious beings.

As we travel the Line of Life we are always at one or another Level of Being. We have more conscious moments and less conscious moments. What differentiates these moments in life is not how successful we are and how much money we have, how much we have impressed people. What really makes a difference in life is our Level of Being: how conscious we are, how sincere we are, how honest, how aware. Our level of consciousness determines whether we are living with great complexities and problems, great sufferings or with great peace.

If we are angry and vengeful, our life will be filled with circumstances that relate with these qualities. If we are lustful, our life will be filled with the problems related to lust. The more lust, anger, and pride we have, the lower our Level of Being.

What we need is to use the consciousness itself in order to change ourselves internally. The consciousness is the root of perception. It is that part in us that perceives with absolute purity, without feelings, without thinking, and without sensation. It is raw perception in a pure, unaltered form. The consciousness is our direct connection with our own divinity. This is the root principle upon which every genuine meditation practice is based.

We need to learn what our Level of Being is and we learn that by being vigilant, by learning how to watch, how to pay attention, how to be conscious of our movement through the Line of Life. The more conscious we are of our movement through life, the more we raise our Level of Being.

Reference~ gnosticteachings.org