Until I Realized

 

I was once afraid of fear

Until I learned to feel it

And not let it suffocate me

But rather to allow it to gently flow through me

So that I may transform it into passion, purpose and meaning

I was once afraid of grief

Until I realized

It was a treasured visitor

For it revealed the vast ocean of love

That lay within me

And my capacity to feel

And care for others deeply

I was once afraid of rejection

Until I realized

That it need not cause me any hurt or harm

When I was able to fully embrace and accept myself

And honour my strengths and greatness

Celebrating the beauty and brilliance that lay within me

I was once afraid of heartbreak

Until I realized

That my heart was my own

And the only person who could truly break it

Was me

Through me disowning myself

And valuing how another person saw me

Above how I chose to see myself

And giving them the power to shape

How I felt about myself and my reality

I was once afraid of failure

Until I realized

That it was my greatest teacher

And that pain need not stem from it

When it empowered me to choose and act better in the future

And live more compassionately

I was once afraid of shame

Until I learned to befriend it

Then gently farewell it

Through granting myself permission to be imperfect

And make mistakes

While not letting them define or limit me

I was once afraid of guilt

Until I gave it purpose

And redirected it toward meaningful action

Allowing it to propel me along a path of love and healing

I was once afraid of my negative thoughts

Until I realized that their origin was my emotions

And by calming and uplifting myself

They would transform accordingly

I was once afraid of anger

Until I realized that it was not meant to be suppressed or ignored

But felt fully

Fuelling me to take passionate action toward what was most meaningful and important to me

I was once afraid of discomfort

Until I realized

It was one of my greatest guides

Revealing all that was in need of changing and healing within me

And I was once afraid of my shadow

Until I realized

That I was the alchemist of my life

And the power to transmute the darkness into light

Lay within me.

Words by Tahlia Hunter 

The Lovers’ Dance of Darkness and Light

 

he held her words

in the silence 

pressed them

into his heart 

and healed

a thousand lifetimes

of wounds 

and eternal grief 

absorbing her light

as she absorbed

his reflection 

How I Choose to Remember You

I choose to remember you

Not by how you hurt me

But by how you taught me to heal

Not by how you left me

But by how you taught me to never abandon myself 

Not by how you broke me

But by how you taught me to rebuild myself 

Not by how you dimmed my light  

But by how you helped me to shine 

Not by how you kept me trapped in a place of comfort 

But by how you empowered me to leave my comfort zone 

Not by how you left me feeling weak

But by how you taught me what it means to be strong 

Not by how you tried to control me 

But by how you taught me to be free

Not by who you told me who I was

But by how you taught me to define myself 

And above all

I choose to remember you 

Not by how you were unable to love me 

But by how you taught me 

To love myself. 

~ Words by Tahlia Hunter 

Anam Cara, Soul Friend

 

In the Celtic tradition, there is a beautiful understanding of love and friendship. One of the fascinating ideas here is the idea of soul-love; the old Gaelic term for this is anam cara. Anam is the Gaelic word for soul and cara is the word for friend. So anam cara in the Celtic world was the "soul friend."

In everyone's life, there is a great need for an anam cara, a soul friend. In this love, you are understood as you are without mask or pretension. The superficial and functional lies and half-truths of social acquaintance fall away, you can be as you really are. Love allows understanding to dawn, and understanding is precious. Where you are understood, you are at home.

The anam cara experience opens a friendship that is not wounded or limited by separation or distance. Such friendship can remain alive even when the friends live far away from each other. Because they have broken through the barriers of persona and egoism to the soul level, the unity of their souls is not easily severed. When the soul is awakened, physical space is transfigured. Even across the distance, two friends can stay attuned to each other and continue to sense the flow of each other's lives. With your anam cara you awaken the eternal.

—John O'Donohue

The Gift of Pain from Heartbreak

 

He hurt her deeply

When he did nothing

He created a pain

Inside a wound

That already existed

She loved him deeply

But to her

It didn't feel like enough

Maybe she wasn't enough

She thought she was incomplete

Without him

She had to face her past

All the times

She felt invisible

To the men

In her life

Maybe she just needed time

Time to understand herself better

And figure out

That she may be hurt

But not damaged

The men

She realized

Who broke her heart

Actually gifted her

Because now she's confronting her pain

Facing her fears

And hears a faint voice whispering

I believe in you, even when no one did

I'm there for you, when it felt no one was

I love you, when others didn't know how to

That voice is what keeps her going

Keeps her looking forward

Instead of back

And keeps her believing

There is a love

Out there

That can unravel her nerves

Calm her storms

And explore her deep waters

With a wildness

And patience

She aches for

What is Not Love

 If you need someone to be happy, that's not love.

 IT IS LACK.

 If you are jealous, insecure and do anything to keep someone by your side, even knowing that you are not loved, and you say that you believe in that person, but not in others, who seem like rivals to you, that is not love.

 IT IS LACK OF SELF LOVE.

 If you think your life is empty without that person;  You can't imagine yourself alone and you maintain a relationship that ended just because you don't have a life of your own, that's not love.

 IT IS DEPENDENCE.

 If you think that the loved one belongs to you;  you feel master and owner of his life and his body;  You don't give him the opportunity to express himself, to make up his mind, just to assert your dominance, that's not love.

 IT IS SELFISH.

 If you don't want it;  you do not fulfill yourself as a man or woman with this person;  you prefer not to have intimate relations with that person, however, you feel some pleasure in being by their side, that is not love.

 IT'S FRIENDSHIP.

 If they argue for any reason;  they are dying of jealousy of each other;  they don't always make the same plans;  they lack agreement in various situations;  they don't like to do the same things or go to the same places, but there is a desire to be intimately together, that is not love.

 IT IS DESIRE.

 If your heart beats stronger;  the sweat becomes intense, your temperature goes up and down dizzyingly, just thinking about the other person, that is not love.

 IT IS PASSION.

 Now that you know what love is not…

 It is easier to analyze what is happening with you and try to resolve the situation or program yourself to attract someone for whom you feel "true love" that feeling of affection, passion, intimacy and genuine commitment;  feeling of emotional and sexual attraction that you have towards a person, and that this person also feels the same for you, so that they can build a balanced relationship, based on true love...Bali